5 Rules of Survival for MUG Wearers

Avoid getting MUGGED in a dark alley.
We recommend an enclosed, private space with an appropriate recycling receptacle for you to deposit the obsolete leg-specific garments you are replacing.
If you run into a MUGGER in a dark alley, show no fear.
Simply remind your fellow Macabi-wearer of Rule #1, and encourage him to seek an appropriate location to debifurcate his wardrobe. In case of emergency, offer to act as a look-out.
Never raise your MUG.
When a tavern full of burly toughs calls on all drinkers to raise their mugs in salute, please forgive their ignorance and lift your stein. Or simply tip your glass.
When asked for a MUG shot, please use your face.
Rule #4 is especially useful when disregarding Rule #3 leads to your arrest for indecent exposure and/or inciting a bar fight. We’re sure your MUG is quite handsome, but exposing it to the camera will not likely accelerate your release.
Get your MUG on TV.
Show the world your masculine virtue and total self-confidence. Wear your MUG in public places. Show off its many practical configurations. Even if you become desperate for attention, there is no need to hire a PR firm. Simply ignoring Rule #3 ought to do the trick.